Friday Faves!

Felicity

Happy Friday, my Friends!  Are you as excited for the weekend as I am?  My entire family is descending upon Virginia Beach and I just can't wait!  Each time we get together it seems yet another body is added to the mix, which always makes it quite the adventure!  Sure should make for some interesting blogging material...until then, here are a few of my favorites:

Trish Ryan's post on reality TV makes me feel much better about my guilty pleasures.  She also has a great post on Amy Julia Becker's new book, A Good And Perfect Gift.  Here's my favorite line:

"We all need other stories to remind us of the larger realm of what is possible...and how very differently our lives can turn out, with options far more varied and interesting than statistics suggest."  

This reminds me of another quote from a favorite TV show that I've recently picked back up, Felicity.  Are there any other Felicity fans out there?  Thanks to my fabulous roommate Megan, Felicity carried me through college.  I can't say she always helped me out emotionally...there was one time where I was "drunk" on Felicity and convinced myself I had made a mistake about a boy I was no longer dating.  I called Josie to talk to her about it and she said, "Elizabeth, this is a horrible idea.  Stop watching Felicity and snap out of it!"  Don't we all need a friend like Josie in our lives?  Thank you Josie!!  Now that my love life has calmed down a bit, I've loved reconnecting with the love triangle that is Felicity, Ben and Noel.

Okay, sorry for the random tangent, here's the Felicity quote that a dear friend recently reminded me of from the ever-wise Sally after Felicity and Ben get mugged in season 1:

"It's true what you said about soldiers, how they form a special bond.  But eventually the battle ends, and those who survive, they go home and try and make sense of it all...I guess we all have our own war stories, but they're meant to be shared—they have to be, because these stories are what bring us together and they keep us alive."      

There is something so fresh, raw, and complexly beautiful about stories—the good, the bad, and the ugly.  I love the reminder that they were made to be shared.  Thanks to so many of you who graciously share your stories with me!


Have a fabulous, story filled weekend!
      

Hope

So yesterday, via two fabulous women, I was drawn to the compellingly beautiful words of Ann Voskamp and just had to share them with you:

"If I only hope when things look hopeful, isn’t my hope cliche, posturing?

I’m only truly hoping when all is hopeless — otherwise it isn’t hope.

And then — It’s precisely in the dark of the hopeless –  that hope can unfold into it’s full, strong wing."

Let us hold unswervingly to the hope we profess, for He who promised is faithful.
Hebrews 10:23

Runway Ready

Changing Seasons luncheon at UVA with Trish Ryan

Okay, so it's easy to say that we shouldn't be concerned with our outward appearance, but it's a another thing to actually live that.  Even with the best of intentions, I can't help but wonder how others see me and I'm constantly comparing myself to others.  I had the joy of hearing Trish Ryan speak to a group of girls on Friday and at the beginning of her talk, she put it this way:

"Whenever you bring a group of women together, no matter how cute you felt when you walked in, immediately we start to look around the room and find someone who is prettier, skinnier, younger, or more pulled together than we are."

Yesterday, I was on the phone with my 23 year-old sister and we were discussing our emerging wrinkles...really?!  Wrinkles?  27, maybe, but not 23... So the fact is, there are always going to be people who I think look better than I do (including my beautiful sisters), but the Truth is that in God's eyes, I'm perfect.

On some level, I will always struggle with comparing myself to other women, but rather than focusing on what I'm not, or what I'm lacking, why not try to focus on what is?   

Based on the fabulous promises found in God's Word, here's what God thinks of us:

The king is enthralled by your beauty; honor him, for he is your lord.
Psalm 45:11

All beautiful you are, my darling; there is no flaw in you.
 Song of Solomon 4:7

I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
   your works are wonderful,
   I know that full well.

Psalm 139:14

I have loved you, my (daughter), with an everlasting love.
      With unfailing love I have drawn you to myself."

Jeremiah 31:3 (NLT)  

(insertion added)

"Draw near to Me, and My presence will envelop you in Love."
-Jesus Calling based on James 4:8 (NKJV)

Dress It Up With A Little Strength & Dignity

I certainly spend my fair share of time worrying over my outer appearance always wondering I'm in style, out of style, lumpy, oily, frizzy,  sweaty, or wrinkly, but I'll be honest, I don't spend near the same amount of time concerned with my inner appearance. 

1 Samuel 16:7 says, "People look at the outward appearance, but the LORD looks at the heart."

When God looks at my heart, I wonder what he sees?  I know I am fully loved, no matter what my heart may look like, but when God looks at my heart, I so desperately want Him to see a heart that's head over heels in love with Him!  I want Him to see a heart that is more concerned with adorning myself with the things of God than anything else.

Strength and dignity are her clothing and her position is strong and secure; she rejoices over the future [the latter day or time to come, knowing that she and her family are in readiness for it]!...Charm and grace are deceptive, and beauty is vain [because it is not lasting], but a woman who reverently and worshipfully fears the Lord, she shall be praised!

Proverbs 31:25,30 (AMP)

Confessions of A Shopaholic

Isla Fischer as Shopaholic Becky Bloomwood, one of my favorite fictional heroines

So, I have this friend.  I've written about her a few times here and here.  Ya'll, her eyes are so open and ready to see where and how God is going to speak.  You would be amazed at the crazy, unexpected ways He does.  Each time we get together, there's always another story of how God was so faithful, so specific, and so totally crazy, it just had to be Him.  It's so encouraging and inspiring to be friends with her...I'll confess, sometimes I leave a little jealous that I don't see God as frequently, but usually, I leave in awe of our God who is so alive, so active, and so clearly moving.   

Last week, I was sitting in my favorite little corner of our house, in my beloved swivel rocker looking out the big window in our living room.  For whatever reason, there were like fifteen birds chirp, chirp, chirping away and one cardinal that I was particularly taken by.  Have you ever really stopped and looked at birds?  I can't say I typically take the time to study them, but I was strangely drawn to this little bird and her beauty, energy, and freedom.  I did think the influx of birds was a little odd, but I decided to continue my morning routine...I sat in my chair and opened the Bible.  Any guess to what verse I happened to stumble upon?  That little passage in Matthew that talks about worrying, seeking,  birds, flowers, and clothes.  

Here's where we get to the confession: I love shopping.  Not only do I love to shop, but I LOVE clothes!  Unfortunately, the small clothing budget that I've had has pretty much gone from minimal to non-existent as we settle into grad school (though I did squeeze in a fabulous business school gift for myself right before we had to tighten our purse strings...who says I can't plan ahead?!)  It's not that I'm forbidden to shop, but I'm trying so hard to be good and make wise choices.  With fall weather swooshing in, it's hard—there are blazers, cardigans, boots, wedges, and work dresses calling my name.

Is this a major problem?  Certainly not!  But even something as little as my shopping struggles matter to God.  So last week, after admiring this beautiful cardinal, and then I unexpectedly turning to Matthew 6, I was trying to take a cue from my friend and pay attention!  

That is why I tell you not to worry about everyday life—whether you have enough food and drink, or enough clothes to wear. Isn’t life more than food, and your body more than clothing?  Look at the birds. They don’t plant or harvest or store food in barns, for your heavenly Father feeds them. And aren’t you far more valuable to him than they are?  Can all your worries add a single moment to your life?

And why worry about your clothing? Look at the lilies of the field and how they grow. They don’t work or make their clothing, yet Solomon in all his glory was not dressed as beautifully as they are. And if God cares so wonderfully for wildflowers that are here today and thrown into the fire tomorrow, he will certainly care for you. Why do you have so little faith?

  

So don’t worry about these things, saying, ‘What will we eat? What will we drink? What will we wear?’  These things dominate the thoughts of unbelievers, but your heavenly Father already knows all your needs.  Seek the Kingdom of God above all else, and live righteously, and he will give you everything you need.  So don’t worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will bring its own worries. Today’s trouble is enough for today.

Matthew 6:25-34 (NLT)

At that moment, I felt as if God was saying, "Seek Me.  I am more than enough.  I am sufficient.  I know exactly what you need and I promise to provide for you." 


In all of my years of seeking God, I may not get everything I want, but without question, God has been so faithful to go above and beyond to provide me with every single thing I need.  He alone, is always, always more than enough! 

Even strong young lions sometimes go hungry, but those who trust in the Lord will lack no good thing.

Psalm 34:10

And my God will liberally supply (fill to the full) your every need according to His riches in glory in Christ Jesus.

Philippians 4:19 (AMP)

    

Friday Faves!

Two of my favorite SJP outfits from I Don't Know How She Does It.

 Happy Friday!  A few of my favorite things from the week before we head into the weekend...

LOVE this post from Lysa Terkeurst, My Jesus In Five Days

Challenged & encouraged by Mary Elizabeth's latest post on Hope.

Nina from Songs to Sing makes a great case for her favorite Disney Princess

Any one else out there with some expectant friends?  Great ideas for gifts courtesy of Cup of Jo.

Speaking of gifts, there are three new shopping webistes I'm pretty pumped about (As if I need more excuses to shop!) 

First up, Birch Box.  $10 each month for 4-5 samples of fancy cosmetics delivered to your door.  If you know me well, you know I'm a sucker for fancy cosmetics.  4-5 bottles of lotions, potions, and lip gloss each month is right up my alley! 

Next we have Stitch Fix.  Get this, you send in your size and style preferences and each month, they mail you a box of clothes.  Fancy, right?!  Whatever you don't like, you can send back free of charge.  Isn't that fabulous?!  They're still in the emerging stages, but click here to get on the list. 

Lastly, courtesy of Nina, I learned about Citrus Lane--gift boxes for new moms!  Isn't that cool?  You can even buy a package and every month or so, they'll mail you mother and baby essentials according to the age of the child.

Why didn't I think of these things?

Have a fabulous weekend, friends!!

 

Stepping Out

So last night, the whole world was eagerly awaiting  Simon Cowell's long awaited return to television with his soon-to-be hit, The X-Factor.   Not only did we get Simon back, but Paula too!  Did you watch it?

I only watched about 10 minutes, but I'm beyond certain I saw the best part.  42 year-old Stacy Frank is a single mom who was born to sing, but with the challenges of raising two small children, combined with years of people, including an abusive significant other, telling her that she was too old, not good enough, or never going to make it,  she "lost faith in herself and got stuck."

Deciding it was time to take a chance, she approaches the stage and tells Simon, "I don't want to die with this music in me..."

Then she starts to sing...just a simple, easy song by Aretha Franklin—no biggie.  Oh. My. Word. Ya'll, she was good!  Even Simon stood up to applaud her.  She had so much passion, heart, and emotion behind her voice.  She's one of those people where you look and say, "this is what you were made for; this is what you were born to do!"  I mean, we're not even to the finale/makeover/homecoming shows, and there I was alone on my couch, and I got misty, teary, full-out wept.  

What is wrong with me?  I couldn't believe I was getting so emotional over The X-Factor.  But as I pondered my reaction, there was a part of me that was so encouraged that after years of hearing and believing lies, she finally took a risk.  After hiding her gift in her bathroom at home, she finally stepped out and decided to share it.  You just HAVE to watch this:
(Email subscribers click here.)


 
Don't we all have a little Stacy in us?  Easily weighed down by lies, doubts, and fears that make us too scared to step out and so just like Stacy, we find ourselves stuck.

Admittedly, most of us won't find ourselves winning American Idol...and even if I wanted to try, I'm pretty sure I'm approaching the age limit!  But each one of us has unique gifts, talents, and dreams.  Each one of us has been set apart by God for a specific purpose.

Is there something inside of you, bursting to get out?  What are you waiting for?

I just love what God says to Jeremiah in chapter 1:

"I knew you before I formed you in your mother’s womb.  Before you were born I set you apart and appointed you as my prophet to the nations...Don’t say, ‘I’m too young,’ for you must go wherever I send you and say whatever I tell you.  And don’t be afraid of the people, for I will be with you and will protect you...today I have made you strong like a fortified city that cannot be captured... I am with you, and I will take care of you.” (NLT)

"God's Spirit beckons.  There are things to do and places to go!"

Romans 8:14-15 (MSG)

 

Come Away With Me

I've written about this a little before, but there are times when I hear a song on the radio, and even though it's totally not about God, I can't help but put a faithful spin to it.

So yesterday, after posting Matthew 11 where Jesus says, "Come to me. Get away with me and you'll recover your life. I'll show you how to take a real rest," when I heard Norah Jones' Come Away With Me, I couldn't help but think about our precious God and how He sweetly calls to us, "Come."  


In the midst our craziness and stress, Come. 

When we're so tired we can't feel like we can even move, Come.

In spite of our failings, sin, and shortcomings, Come. 

So in love with us is our faithful God, that He beckons over and over again, Come. 

If anyone thirsts, let him come to me and drink.

John 7:37  

"Come, all you who are thirsty, come to the waters...Give ear and come to me; hear me, that your soul may live."

Isaiah 55:1,3

Unforced Rhythms of Grace

 
Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion? Come to me. Get away with me and you'll recover your life. I'll show you how to take a real rest. Walk with me and work with me—watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won't lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you.  Keep company with me and you'll learn to live freely and lightly.

Matthew 11:28-30

"I am a champion plate spinner...I have the wife plate going, the mom plate going, the pastor plate going, the speaker plate going, and the friend plate going...I have learned that the only way to negotiate all the plates that God has given to me is to get great at walking with Jesus.  When I spend my time with Him, everything else gets put in perspective.  Instead of panicking at all that I need to accomplish today, I really am peaceful.  In fact, many times I have gotten up from chatting with God and discovered the answers on how to fit all the pieces of my day together.  By giving God that time, He has seemingly given me more.  

Religion can be exhausting.  There is no way that you and I can keep all the rules...if we are burned out on religion, we just have to get away with Him.  Only with Him can we learn the unforced rhythms of grace."

-Holly Wagner, Daily Steps for God Chicks  

How Do We Do It?

As many of you know, I LOVE going to movies!  So when the newest chick flick, I Don't Know How She Does It, hit theaters this weekend, I, along with four of my newest friends, made sure not to miss it!

The movie is about a woman named Kate who constantly finds herself battling life as a wife, mother, and successful career woman.  Just how many different balls can one woman juggle?   Check out the preview below:
(Email subscribers, click here)




I found the movie to be sweet and predictable...just my style!  I will say, though, there were times I felt stressed and anxious—I don't even have children yet, but could totally relate to Kate's struggle to try to be everything to everybody, be in multiple places at once, keep track of the never ending "to-do list", and try to give the appearance like her life is totally put together.  I feel like no matter what season we're in—working mom, stay-at-home mom, student, career girl—it's so easy to feel those kinds of pressures.

So early this morning, I was lying in bed thinking about a few truths to ground me when I feel pressure, anxious, or like an utter failure...

When I feel like I can't do any of it...I can DO ALL THINGS through Christ.

When I feel like I'm left to handle everything by myself...I have a God who will NEVER LEAVE ME or forsake me. 

When I feel like a complete and utter failure...I am FEARFULLY and WONDERFULLY MADE; I am loved with an everlasting love.

When I feel totally lost and confused...God has a PLAN and a PURPOSE.

When I feel like I can't function one more day...God is my STRENGTH and PORTION.

And when I feel weak, depleted, and exhausted...God beckons, "COME TO ME and I will give you REST."


On my own, I can absolutely do nothing....but with God...with God, we are strengthened, equipped, and utterly loved.  With God, we can do it! 

Friday Faves!

Parenthood

Happy Friday my Friends!  Here are few of my favorite things...

After Wednesday's post on Comfort vs. Calling, I was really encouraged by this article my mom sent me, How Do I Know If I'm Called. 

Last night, I was delighted to reconnect with the season premier of my favorite new shows, Parenthood.  Have you seen it?  It's created by the maker of Friday Night Lights and I just can't get enough.  I discovered it via Josie's blog and her mom's great review.  I love how real the families are and the issues they're struggling with.  Definitely worth checking out! 

And speaking of Friday Night Lights, there were two recent posts that referenced the fabulous Coach Taylor:


The Victory from @ Hope Heals

Great Questions Asked of Manly Men @ Trish's Dishes

Have a wonderful weekend!!

He Responds

Recently, as some of you might recall, I'm learning more and more about being thankful. 

This morning, my heart is heavy with prayer needs—sicknesses I want God to heal, broken hearts I want God to restore, events that I want God to perfect, callings I want God to confirm, and boulders I want to see Him to move. 

This morning, I'm incredibly thankful that when we call out to God in prayer, not only does He hear us, but He responds.

Oh, that we might know the Lord!
      Let us press on to know him.
   He will respond to us as surely as the arrival of dawn
      or the coming of rains in early spring.

Hosea 6:3 (NLT)

What are you thankful for?

Comfort vs. Calling

Two weeks ago at work, I was fortunate enough to become the recipient of a brand new laptop.  This is an amazing treat for several reasons, one being that it would typically take about 10 minutes each day to load my former computer and then had to re-boot approximately 4-5 times each day.   So that's about 40-50 minutes each day where I was sitting around trying to restart my computer.  Not exactly the most efficient, reliable machine. 

Those of you who have ever gotten a new computer or operating system know that even if your old computer is on the fritz, it takes a while to adjust to your new machine.  Now, each time I try to delete something, I inevitably hit "num lock" instead and my hands are trained to begin typing in a different postiion, so my "home keys" are all off whenever I start a new document.

I'm still learning new buttons, clicks, and tricks, and attempting to adjust to the new look, but I know that ultimately, this computer will most certainly become much better than my old computer. Adjustment periods and change aren't always comfortable, but in a situation like this, the end result is worth it.  Each week gets easier and in a few weeks, I will comfortably be able to navigate a faster, more advanced computer and operating system.

That same week, I heard a wonderful talk by Beth Moore where she said, "We will miss the greatest adventures of our calling if we remained compelled by comfort....God is so much more interested in our calling than our comfort." 

It would be easy for me to say, "no thank you, I'll take the slow, pokey, dying computer, because that's what I'm comfortable with", but I would be missing out.  Or I could decide after giving it a try, that  I didn't want the adjustment period and run back to what's familiar, but again, I would be missing out.

Similarly, there are times in our lives when God might be calling us into a new season that isn't familiar, comfortable, or easy, but when we choose to follow our calling over our comfort, we open ourselves up to experiencing an incredible adventure and fulfilling God's purpose for our lives.

Me of all people, will tell you that I LOVE my comfort—I live for stability, comfort, and ease.  But sometimes, there are those nudges...nudges that we wouldn't typically be telling ourselves...try out for varsity field hockey...apply to lead a missions trip to Sri Lanka...start a blog...things in my life that certainly weren't comfortable for me at the time, but without question, turned into fabulous adventures with my God.

Sometimes it's okay to be a little uncomfortable and when God is calling you, it is always, always, always worth it!! 
 

Bringing Me Back

When it comes to writing about my faith on a regular basis, there are times when I think God looks at me and lovingly laughs...it doesn't take long after I hit "publish" for me to pretty much forget what I had just said and run in the opposite direction.  I mean well, but so often, I miss the mark.  But God, so gracious and loving is He, that He always brings me back into His fold. 

Last Tuesday, when I wrote about my anniversary and how our husbands weren't meant to complete us, I was actually in Norfolk for work, so we didn't really get to celebrate...we celebrated Sunday, which I thought would be more than okay, but very unexpectedly, on Tuesday I found myself emotional, hormonal, tired and missing Bernie.  

Typically on these days, I can't wait to run home and have him cook me a delicious meal, hold me, and let me watch a chick flick...yes, sometimes he caves.  When I realized that wasn't even an option, my heart sank.  Driving home to my parents, I was teary and mopey, and I felt God very lovingly whisper, "Do you even remember what you wrote this morning?  Let Me nourish you.  Let Me hold You.  Let Me sustain you.  I am the One who completes you."     

How soon I forget!

But even when I forget His Truth time and time again, I feel so loved by a God who comes back time and time again to remind me that He will always be enough.  He alone is my portion.  My heart may easily wander, but there is truly nothing more desirable on earth than our glorious God.  

"Whom have I in heaven but You? And I have no delight or desire on earth besides You.  My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the Rock and firm Strength of my heart and my Portion forever."

Psalm 73:25-26 (AMP)

Desert Song

Happy Monday!  I hope you had the most wonderful weekend!  As we start off a new week, I wanted to share with you a video that has really touched my heart lately.  Last year, I shared about a worship song I had grown to love called Desert Song by Hillsong.  I wrote about it here and here. 

Recently, I found a video that shared a little background to the first live recording of the song that is incredibly powerful—I love how real Jill is and chooses to worship God in every season, even through extreme tragedy and when she's not feeling it.
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Also, here's the original song:

Friday Faves!

Hello my friends!  Happy Friday!  Here are a few of my latest favorites:

Favorite Flower Girl Picture from Cally's Wedding:

Photo by Elise Theuer

Favorite post:
When A Man Loves A Woman @ Every Bitter Thing Is Sweet.


Favorite Recipe:
Chicken Enchiladas with Roasted Tomatillo Salsa

Favorite books on my shelf that I can't wait to read:
The Paris Wife
A Good And Perfect Gift: Faith, Expectations, and a Little Girl Named Penny

Favorite plans for the weekend:
Showering Josie and her sweet baby girl in DC! 

Husbands & Girlfriends

Photo by Patricia Lyons--can you tell I'm slightly obsessed with her?

Okay, we've finally reached day three of our mini-marriage series.  The third tip I've learned over the past three isn't necessarily life changing, but it was something that I personally needed to learn as our marriage continued.

3.  Your husband is not your girlfriend.

That's right, not only is your husband not your god, but he's also not your girlfriend.  This may sound pretty obvious to some of you, but coming from a family with four daughters and only one son and then six years of living with the most incredible group of girls in college and post-college, living with a boy took some adjusting.  

It took me a while to learn that my sweet husband didn't really want to watch Gossip Girl, The Bachelor, or Grey's Anatomy; solely live off popcorn and ice cream for dinner; discuss the latest celebrity gossip of the day; or have in-depth conversations about whether or not our dating friends would get married—you know, all the really deep stuff!  

There was one point where I was trying to make him do something really ridiculous... I can't remember what it was exactly, but I think it was centered around either trying to fill out a scorecard for Miss America or rate Oscar dresses on the red carpet and he looked at me and sweetly said, "Elizabeth, I'm not your girlfriend."  He was completely right.  He's my husband, not my girlfriend—that's what my girlfriends are for!

Just because you're married, doesn't mean that you have to do everything together, find a few things you love to enjoy together—for us it's cooking, tennis, hunkering down for a TV marathon, playing cards, skiing, and going on walks with Neely.  But also be sure to make time to do the things you love as well—Bernie loves hunting, fishing, and concerts and I love bargain shopping, power walking, and girly TV and movies.  I had to learn that even though we're married, it's okay for us to still do the things we love with other people who enjoy them too!  

That night also made me increasingly aware of my need to continue to invest in the fabulous women God placed in my life.  I was looking to Bernie to be my husband, but also fill the void in my heart for female companions.  Just because you're married doesn't mean all of your other relationships have to disappear.  There is still a major place in my heart that needs to be nurtured and encouraged by my sweet girlfriends, whether we're watching The Real Housewives, or on an intense power walk as we share life's challenges and discuss our faith.  There's room for all of it!      

 

Don't Let The Sun Go Down On Me

Photo by the fabulous Patricia Lyons

In case you missed yesterday, we're talking a little bit about marriage this week.  Yesterday I talked about how in the three years I've been married, I continue to learn that our husbands were made to compliment us, but not complete us.  Ready for number two? 

Don't go to bed angry. 

If you've taken any marriage course or read any book on marriage, chances are you've heard this one.  It's right up there with "love isn't always a feeling, sometimes it's a choice."  So, as I entered into the married world, I thought I had "don't let the sun go down on your anger" from Ephesians 4 pretty much covered.  I can surely handle that, right??

Wrong.

I will tell you, though, it didn't take me long to learn why this is one of the most valuable little tips and also one of the most quoted.  I can't speak for everyone else, but in my experience, here's why this didn't work out so well:

1.  I didn't sleep peacefully or comfortably all night. 

Have you ever tried sleeping in the same bed with someone you're supposedly "furious" with?  It's a lot of work!  Every time I fell asleep, I would forget I was supposed to still be mad and roll over to his side for a little snuggle, only to wake up and remember that angry wives weren't supposed to snuggle their husbands, and roll as far away to the other edge as I could—I spent the whole night rolling back and forth—it was exhausting.  Sleepy Elizabeth didn't want to stay mad, but awake Elizabeth was still pretty upset—not a great combo for getting your full 8 hours in!  

2.  When the sun finally rose again, I still had to revisit my anger.

So when the sun rises is all forgotten and figured out?  Not quite...had I chosen to not let the sun go down on my anger, I could have woken up with a brand new day and left the past in the past, but by not handling it that night, I had to wake up and start all over.  Not only did this fight that, believe it or not, I had already totally blown out of proportion, completely ruin my night, but it ruined my morning as well. I didn't eagerly awake to a new day, but I woke up with dread that I still had to revisit the icky parts of yesterday and have it last not one, but two days. 

As a stubborn, controlling girl, this is still super duper hard for me—I hate admitting fault and I hate to surrender, but this is one goal that we both strive for in our marriage.  There are still times when we both need our space, but whatever is dividing us, we try to make sure that even if we might not totally agree, we're at peace before our heads hit the pillow.  It doesn't mean everything is always perfect before we call it a night, but even if it isn't, we choose to not be angry with the situation or with one another...that's where that "love isn't always a feeling, sometimes it's a choice" comes in handy!  

And while we're on the subject I just have to say, that when it comes to fighting, if your husband is like my husband, the silent treatment is not really a punishment.  If anything, you're doing him a favor.  Several times early on in our marriage, I tried to teach him a lesson with my most impressive, dramatic silent treatment, but I'm pretty sure he had no idea...he was just happy for a little quiet!   

And one last thing...when it comes to a lovers spat, I just have to say, "grace, grace, grace."  In three years, I continue to learn so much about God's grace, my husband's grace, and my struggle to bestow grace, and while I still have quite a ways to go, I'm beyond grateful for grace.  

Three Years!

Photos by the incredible Patricia Lyons. 

Three years ago today, on September 6th, 2008, in the midst of hurricane Hanna, I married my perfect match.  It's hard to believe it's already been three years, but there's also a part of me that feels like I've been married forever, because, I just can't imagine my life without him.  I am incredibly blessed.

So with ALL my wealth of marriage experience, I thought it would be fun this week to share some "lessons learned" for the future marrieds, the newlyweds, and the seasoned veterans.  For the record, by NO means am I any expert...I mean, hopefully I'm only like 5% of the way into this thing, but in my limited three years, I've managed to put together three little tips that I'll share over the next three days.  Ready for number 1?

1.  Husbands were made to compliment us, but not complete us—there is only One who can fully complete us.         

I've written about this a little before, but as women, I think it's easy for us to try to replace God with our current love interest be it a husband, boyfriend, or a major crush.  Once you get married, it becomes increasingly convenient...all of a sudden, you have this good looking guy living with you all the time—one who vowed to love, protect, honor, and provide for you.  When Mr. Wonderful is always around, it's easy to lose sight of the main Man in our life, and replace Him with a tangible love, affection, and affirmation that husbands often provide.

Sooner or later though, no matter how "perfect" Mr. Wonderful may be, he is going to fall short, disappoint, or let us down.  Husbands were designed to compliment us, but they weren't made to complete us—there's only One who can fully complete.  His love for us is perfect, everlasting, and completely fulfilling.  His pursuit of us is constant and continual.  He will never leave us and no matter what we do, He will never stop loving us.  He, above all the Mr. Wonderfuls in the world, is worthy of our heart, our affection.    


So, my sweet friends, when you find your Mr. Wonderful, or if you've already married him, no matter how completely perfect he is, don't neglect or downgrade your First Love—He is so worthy of our affection and He deeply longs for our hearts.    

"Hear, O Israel: The LORD our God, the LORD is one.  Love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength."

Deuteronomy 4:4-6

"I wait for the LORD, my soul waits, and in his word I put my hope...O Israel, put your hope in the LORD, for with the LORD is unfailing love and with him is full redemption."   

Psalm 130:5, 7

Friday Favorties from Cally

Cally is about to share some of her favorites today, but before she does, we have a service opportunity for anyone in the Virginia Beach/North Carolina area:

My friend Peyton is heading down to The Outer Banks with Operation Blessing this weekend for some Irene disaster relief on Saturday.  61 homes were flooded out in Stumpy Point, NC and they're looking for as many volunteers as they can get--just need to be 18 or older. 

If you're willing and able, you can contact Peyton for more info:  757-748-4533 or peyton.hoffman@yahoo.com. 

Thanks!! 

Okay, here's our little newlywed...

Elizabeth asked me to share some of my Friday Favorites, and I am so excited to do just that!

First of all, I got my wedding photos back from the fabulous Elise Theuer!  Here are a few of my favorites:

Photos by Elise Theuer

My favorite place to scan is pinterest.com.  It's fun to "pin" your favorite photos and ideas from the internet, but even more fun to have a place where everyone else's favorites are consolidated.

My favorite refreshing treat recently has been peach pops from Trader Joe's.  They have chunks of peaches frozen right in there...DELICIOUS!  

Speaking of peaches, here is a yummy peach parfait recipe I am planning to make this weekend.  That site has also provided wonderful inspiration for me trying to cook for two on a budget.  

My favorite meal of the past week was a pre-Irene brunch with a friend at our apartment.   I made my very first fritatta, which was quite delicious if I do say so myself.  Here is a fritatta how-to from the NY Times.  Mine had mushrooms, onions, arugula, canadian bacon, and lots of goat cheese, but you really can just toss a few ingredients into eggs.  

Happy Labor Day! 

Things Are Not Okay

Is it just me, or are there days when it's a bit harder to "feel" God?  My friend Megan used to call it the "warm and fuzzies."  This week, I've has a hard time "feeling" God.  I think there are several reasons, but one being when you watch tragedy strike and people's homes literally wash away, it's hard to even know how to begin to balance your faith and emotions.  "God, I know you are with me, I know you are good, but this really sucks..."

I've been praying for eyes to see and ears to hear, but I'm not really getting much action.  But even in the silent times, where my life and faith feels stuck in a rut, I do know God is there—it's just a bit more of a challenge to see.

So, I've tried to carry on...praying, praising, and choosing to believe that God hears me even if I'm not "feeling" it.  This morning, I received the first glimmer of Light that my eyes have been focused enough to see clearly:

"Seek Me with your whole being.  I do desire to be found by you, and I orchestrate the events of your life with that purpose in mind.  When things go well and you are blessed, you can feel Me smiling on you.  When you encounter rough patches along your life-journey, trust the My Light is still shining upon you.  My reasons for allowing these adversities may be shrouded in mystery, but My continual Presence with you is an absolute promise.  Seek Me in good times; seek Me in hard times.  You will find Me watching over you all the time."

-Jesus Calling

As I write this, a worship song in the background is playing, "Things are not okay right now, and they won't be 'til You come back."  

I have tears in my eyes as I allow those words to settle in...things really aren't okay—tragedy, sickness, turmoil, and loss surrounds the world we live in.  That's not okay, but thankfully, it's also not the end—we have this incredible, everlasting Promise of Jesus forever and ever, and we might not be here to see it, but scripture promises us that Jesus is going to come back to rule and reign on earth once again.  

The lyrics continue, "All I want is to be near you, with you, where you are."  We also have the promise that even though things aren't okay, and this isn't the world we were created for, Jesus is with us—He will never leave us or forsake us.  Even though I can't always "feel" Him, I so desperately need more of Him!  I so desperately want to be near Him, with Him, where He is.    

I loved what my sweet friend, Mary Elizabeth, wrote this week on her blog as she described a recent painful experience:

Yet, we carry on…somehow…each day holds new life, new expectation, new promise.  And we remember that, as my dear former pastor says, “We will be doing fine in 150 years.”  This life is but a vapor, yet it matters to the Lord.